Lunacy 2:Welcome To The Dark Side
by lyonhearted
Summary: What? Another one? Yep, Snape is back, along with his "hallucinations" and some new crazy adventures! Sequel to LUNACY
1. HRH

**Lunacy 2: Welcome To The Dark Side**

A normal day at Hogwarts, it seemed. It had been a month since The Incident, as Snape liked to call it. The Incident was spoken about to nobody, as none of the students nor his colleagues remembered any of it. Not very reassuring to Severus, but he quickly repressed it and went about as if nothing was wrong. The Weasley twins, however, had suspicious smirks on their faces whenever they caught sight of "their favorite potions master".

Later in the day, however, Snape had the misfortune of being summoned by Voldemort, more affectionately known as Marv. He sighed wearily and got up from his potion, a poison that causes death by tickle-attack (not a pleasant way to die, I assure you.) he swept out of his laboratory and made his way to the edge of the school grounds.

Severus apperated to Voldemort's hideout, making sure to straiten out his robes as he walked inside. As soon as he walked through the door to the Grand Ballroom he made sure to bow down low and mutter respectful praises. However, he froze when he spotted the bright pink floorboards…

_Not again_, he pleaded silently as he straitened up, _never again_.

Snape, however hard he tried to forget, still had nightmares about Dumbledore's office and MgGonagall's hair. His composure was tested as he looked around the room slowly. The interior design could quite possibly be described as chic, with a color scheme of white, pink, and red. Quite vulgar. Voldemort himself was wearing a blonde wig, skinny jeans and what looked like a fake bosom under a bright red sparkly shirt. Very MgGonagall-esque.

"I love the new furniture, my Lord," said Severus carefully, not knowing how Voldemort would react to it. However, Voldemort giggled and said, "You do? Yeah, Martha Stuart and I worked out a deal. I broke her out of Azkaban, she redecorated my 'evil lair'."

"Martha Stuart is a witch?" asked Severus.

"Duh!" exclaimed Voldemort, "How else would she be able to make such _ah_-mazing centerpieces? Talent?" He laughed scornfully and said, "Ok Death Eaters, time for the annual meeting!"

Some foolish man in the back (_Probably Wormtail_ thought Snape) spoke up, saying, "Umm, sir, we don't have annual meetings."

"Jeez, you are so stupid Wormtail!" (_I knew it_) "I wanna have annual meetings, 'kay?"

Volemort adressed the rest of the crowd, saying, "First order of business…" He shuffled some pieces of parchment and continued, "…We have to decide whether we hire Justin Timberlake or Britney Spears for the potluck on Friday. Remember that A-G brings salad, H-P brings entrees, and Q-Z brings dessert. Oh, and the theme is _Luau_, so don't forget your cocoanut bras, people! Especially you, Lucy!"

Lucius Malfoy blushed while the others sniggered heartily. "My lord…" he began hesitantly.

Voldemort interrupted him, saying, "Oh, Lucy, 'The Dark Lord' is sooo last season. From now on, I shall be known as 'His Royal Highness', or HRH for short. Got it?"

The Death Eaters murmered their assent, and Vol-er, HRH nodded in satisfaction.

HRH clapped his hands together and said brightly, "Now, I've also decided that tonight, I will be hosting a sleepover! Only my most privleged Deaht Eaters will be able to come, so if I say your name, you're one of the lucky ones!"

He cleared his throat and listed off the names, "Avery, Nott, Goyle, Crabbe, Bellatrix, Lucy…" Here he stopped and blew Malfoy a kiss, "…Yaxley, Wormtail, Dolohov, Alecto, Amycus, Lestrange, and _Severus_."

Snape sighed. It was going to be a long evening.


	2. Truth Or Dare

_Disclaimer: Mine? Nien._

Lunacy 2, Ch 2

Voldemort-er, HRH clapped his hands together delightedly. "Yay! All of you are here!"

"Like we wouldn't be", Snape grumbled.

Currently, HRH and his Death Eaters (or DE's) were sitting in a circle, all in various states of undress (don't ask). Attire ranged from footsie pj's (Wormtail) to frilly nightgowns (HRH).

"Alright, who's up for naked twister?" HRH asked cheerfully.

A chorus of groans and exclamations of disgust sounded from the assembled DE's.

"How about we play Truth or Dare?" asked Wormtail timidly.

HR-ah, screw it, _Voldemort_ rolled his eyes and said, "Shut up Wormtail, no one asked you." His eyes lit up and he said, "Hey, why don't we play Truth or Dare?"

The DE's murmured approval, but Wormtail looked crestfallen.

Voldemort cleared his throat and, adjusting his curlers, said, "I'll go first." He turned to Lucius and asked, "Alright, Lucy, truth or dare?"

Lucius blinked in surprise and answered, "Dare."

"Hmmm…" Voldemort thought a moment, then grinned and said, "I dare you to…kill a mudblood!"

"Oooooo…" chorused the DE's.

"How _bloody_ original," growled Severus acidly.

Lucius stood up and ran to the apparition point. A few minutes later he walked back in, unfazed.

"Who did you kill?" asked Voldemort eagerly.

"Wormtail's mom," Lucius said casually. Seeing Wormtail start to hyperventilate, he added, "Oh, come on, she was a walking corpse. Your father could have been considered a necrophilliac (1)." He sat down and said, "Alright, HRH, sir, truth or dare?'

Voldemort pouted and said, 'No fair, I picked you! Truth, then."

Some idiot in the back crowed, "What, are you scared?"

Voldemort stood up so fast it was frightening. "WHO SAID THAT?!" he screamed.

A quivering hand rose. It belonged to Avery.

"Crucio!" screeched Voldemort, and he sat down calmly amidst Avery's screams. He turned back to Lucius and continued, "So, truth?"

Lucius asked, "Who is your favorite minion?"

All of the DE's leaned forward with anticipation.

"Aww, you guys know I don't play favorites!" said Voldemort playfully. It really was a sickening sight.

The DE's all sat back with disappointment.

Voldemort turned to Severus and asked, "Severus…truth or dare?"

Snape mentally groaned and said, "Dare."

Voldemort shouted, "Bring me Harry Potter!"

Snape started in fear and said hurriedly, "Did I say dare? I meant truth."

Voldemort sighed in disappointment and said morosely, "What was your favorite subject in school?"

"Uhhhh…potions." _Duh._

Snape turned to Bellatrix and said, "Well? Truth or dare?"

"Dare," Bellatrix said automatically.

Snape smirked evilly and said, "I dare you to give Crabbe a lap dance."

Everyone jeered and Crabbe looked disgustingly eager. Bellatrix paled be moved forward to…er, "complete her task".

As Bellatrix gave Crabbe a lap dance and moved on to torment Wormtail, Snape pondered the reason for this odd turn of events.

_It must be the same culprit as last time_, Snape concluded, _but what was different about the morning of The Incident? What could have caused such insanity? And WHY was Voldemort wearing female clothing?_

Everyone stopped talking as Voldemort said, "This game bores me. What should we do next?"

Snape dimly registered the other DE's shouting out ideas, but he was to deep in thought to respond. _Was it a spell of some sort that caused a hallucination?_ He paused. _Wait. Is it possible…?_

Snape came back to the real world in time to hear Voldemort shout, "We're playing 7 minutes in heaven because I WANT TO!!"

Severus jumped up in horror and said, "My lord, I must go…I forgot about a potion…"

Voldemort looked crestfallen, but he said, "If you must…" He turned back to his henchmen, who all had looks of horror on their faces.

Snape got up and put his cloak on. While he raced to the apparition point, he wondered, _but who would have put Hallucination potion in my goblet?_

As he reached the apparition point and made to leave, the answer came to him with a vengeance: _THE WEASLEY TWINS._

* * *

**A/N-(1) A necrophiliac is a person who has sex with dead people. Just in case you didn't know. :) **

**REVEIW PLEASE!**


	3. A Potion? Nah

Lunacy 2, Ch 3 Lunacy 2, Ch 3

Snape charged up the steps angrily, muttering foul oaths under his breath. Dinnertime had just ended, so the students were still milling about the hallways. All of them cringed away as they felt the furious professor pass them.

_The Weasley twins must've slipped me Hallucination potion_, Snape thought, irate, _who else would have had a motive and the lack of brains to do it?_

Spotting the twins up ahead, he marched up to the nearest red-headed idiot and snarled, "Alright, where is it?'

Fred, looking confused, stammered, "What are you talking about?"

"The potion, boy, the Hallucination potion you slipped in my potion this morning!" Severus said impatiently, "I know you put it in my goblet a month ago."

Fred and George exchanged uneasy glances. George said, "Umm, sir, we didn't put any potion in your glass. At least, not this morning."

Snape looked at each boy, nonplussed. The looks on their faces were ones of complete sincerity.

_Or, maybe Voldemort's just reeeaaally weird_, Snape thought.

FIN

Short, I know, but that's the ending. Oh well.

Review, s'il vous plait!




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